Or if she sports a tramp stamp.
When my husband showed me this photo of the November 2009 Playboy cover with Marge Simpson on the cover, I thought that Hugh Hefner had finally lost his marbles.
Look, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that female cartoon characters aren't sexy. But come on: MARGE SIMPSON?
Why not, say, Catwoman, or Lara Croft, or that retro-tart, Wonder Woman?
Even my namesake and personal favorite, Josie and the Pussycats, would have been a better choice.
Or to paraphrase Jessica Rabbit: Marge Simpson isn't bad; she's just not drawn that way.
My disbelief has nothing to do with the fact that she's a mother, either. Both Demi Moore and Lisa Rinna proved that posing on a Playboy cover at the peak of motherhood has its allure. (I guess breasts are breasts, right? Talk about an Oedipus complex…)
The cover is being billed as a collectors edition. I guess Playboy's way of bumping sales is by appealing to those who may not normally buy the magazine: Simpsons fans who don't live in their parents' basements.
Because I'm guessing their typical reader isn't necessarily a Simpsons fan (although I'm ready to lay odds that he still lives with Mom and Dad).
I'm guessing Home doesn't mind. I mean, really, how many men can claim The Hef called with an offer to put his wife on the cover of Playboy?
Truth be told, most guys don't buy Playboy for the articles. If this issue sells out, it will validate what I've thought all along:
They buy it for the cartoon.
Move over, Little Anne Fannie, you've got competition,
Secret Lives of Husbands and Wives
Simon & Schuster/Pocket
Look for it in bookstores