One is a Playboy brand: It was when I was at my skinniest, eons (prior to birth of second child) ago.
The other was purchased a couple of years ago. I wanted a pair of tight white jeans for summer, just to say I had them.
That didn't mean I fit in them.
But I do, sort of: if that little pouf of tummy fat over the waistline doesn't count.
Or the fact that my arse looks like two pounds of salami in a one-pound bag.
Gives new meaning to the term "tighty whitey", doesn't it?
Still, I can zip up, so bugger off. And there's not a bit of Spandex in them, just 100% cotton.
Can you say the same, about any pair of jeans you own?
Ha. Thought not. So there.
According to the release below, I'm not the only woman who finds wearing her trophy jeans orgasmic . . .
I mean, for all the RIGHT reasons.
Squeezin' is pleasin' (ouchouchouch),
Simon & Schuster/Downtown Press
Women find fitting into old pair of jeans better than sex
rather bizarre study reveals that women may derive a more pleasurable feeling
by slipping into a pair of old jeans than indulging in a sexual intercourse.
an average, the participants owned at least five pairs of jeans. Nearly 10
percent of the women even claimed that their jeans outlived their longest
relationship regardless of whether it fits them or not.
asked on how they would feel to fit into old jeans, 29.1 percent of women
averred that it would feel better than sex, 28.9 per cent said it would beat a
promotion, 20.6 percent thought it would top a best friend's .
The poll also revealed that nearly 30 percent of women fantasized more about
slimming back into their ''trophy'' jeans than daydreaming about the Hollywood
heartthrobs such as George Clooney or Brad Pitt.
Bryant, from Special K, said, ''Women hold a deep attachment to that one pair
of jeans which they know they look and feel great in. They use them as a
benchmark and a great motivational tool when slimming and it doesn't matter how
old the pair is.
research shows the sense of euphoria and the endorphin rush women get when they
achieve their goal of fitting back into that one special pair of jeans is even
better or on a par with some of the other great pleasures in life."