It's one of those age-old questions.
Now, be honest: would you answer it any differently than one of your knuckle-dragging ancestors?
I'm just sayin' that perhaps we aren't as advanced as we portend to be.Let's face it: here we are, seven millennia after the wheel was invented, and we're still picking our noses — some of us even as we maneuver a snazzy set of four of them, while hurtling at 70 miles-per-hour down a superhighway.
That's because we think no one is watching.
Which brings me back to the food on the floor. What would you do?
The flowchart above, courtesy of SFWeekly, is designed to make you laugh. Or perhaps give you a headache.
If in fact it makes you blush, then maybe it's time you (pun intended) come clean. Consider this your intervention.
Hey, I'll even make it easy for you. Just give the best answer that validates your position:
1. Hell no! Never! No way!
2. Okay, yeah . . .but not while the kids are in the house, because that sets a bad example.
3. You can eat off my kitchen floor any day, so why not? Bon appetit!
4. I say live and let live! What people do in the privacy of their own homes is up to them.
5. There are many third world societies whose members live long and robust lives despite a steady diet of grubs, so yeah, bring it on.
6. That depends on at least one, if not all, of these factors: (a) how long it took me to make (b) how much I paid for the scrumptious morsel, (c) how hungry I am, or (d) if anyone is watching me.
Feel free to leave your comments below.
Is there a right answer?
Seriously, do you need to ask that?
Being the clean freak that I am (those of you who know me well: quit choking on your mojitos) you won't hear me yelling, "Three second rule!" as I dive for some M&M that has rolled off my fingertips.
I guess there is something to be said for chocolates that melt in your hands after all.
Which brings up another issue: sticky fingers. Lick'em, or don't?
Simon & Schuster/Downtown Press