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Totlandia Audiobook - Book 1

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THIS IS BOOK 1 IN AN 8-PART EPISODIC SERIES. Each book completes a story arc, but it includes a series cliffhanger that connects Books 1-4.



The Pacific Heights Moms & Tots Club is the most exclusive children’s playgroup in all of San Francisco. For the city’s ultra-competitive elite, the club’s ten annual spots are the ultimate parenting prize.

But not everyone is PHM&TC material. The club’s founder, Bettina Connaught Cross, adheres to strict membership rules: Moms only. No single parents or working mothers are allowed. Membership is an arduous commitment. And there’s no room in the club for scandal, bad behavior, or imperfection…from tots or their moms.

In a world of power and prestige, no one has more than Bettina. And as every mom in Pacific Heights knows, you simply cannot cross her. But this year’s admissions process is more rigorous than ever, pitting prospective members against each other to prove their mettle. But four of the six candidates vying for the remaining four slots have a secret that would knock them out of the running.

  • Jade is a former stripper and porn actress, who has been absent for most of her son’s life.
  • Jillian’s husband cleaned out their joint accounts and left her for his pregnant assistant.
  • Ally never even had a husband—just a sperm donor—and she’s hiding a high-ranking corporate job.
  • And Lorna fears that her son may have special needs… just the excuse her sister-in-law, Bettina, needs to deny her entry to the club.

Can these hopeful moms keep up appearances long enough to outlast the competition? Or will their chances—and their private lives—go up in flames?

Four playgroup slots up for grabs. Lots of dirty little secrets.

“I love a good mommy sendup as much as the next gal, and this peek into the ridiculousness of the San Francisco upper crust is delightful. Whether or not you've ever had the pleasure (or pain) of joining a playgroup, Brown's tale is as charming as it is cringe-worthy. I laughed, I winced, I kept scrolling.” —Romantic Times

“This book is wonderfully written and has more than just drama. There are touching moments, parts that made me laugh out loud, I felt like I was reading a television show!” —Divine Secrets of a Domestic Goddess


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